Imagine if . . . (29)

Okay, here's the background (don't ask me where this prompt came from!): It's my first time back at the grocery since the manager, in a not-so-kind manner, told me never to bring my kids (this is definitely fiction) into his store again. I'm secretly relieved to have to leave them home with my spouse.Thirty minutes later, I return home--without groceries. Egg yolk is dripping from my hair, chocolate syrup is smeared across my shirt, and smashed produce is sticking to my shoes. What happened?

Well, it went like this: Some deranged customer got mad at me for a really silly reason. I was just wheeling the cart to the checkout, when this man suddenly got extremely angry at me for getting a good spot in line ahead of him. Unable to control himself, he picked up the first thing he could find - a fresh egg - and hurled it at my cranium. What happened after that is a blur of events that I couldn't quite follow in the excitement of the moment. The next thing I knew, people were throwing food at each other, someone was stomping on chocolate syrup bottles and food was everywhere! I was trying to make a dash for the bathroom when the manager suddenly showed up. Recognizing me, he immediately concluded that I was the source of this chaos and his face turned red, then purple.
"Get out of my store! You're even worse without your kids! Don't ever come here again; your business is NOT welcome." With that he seized my arm and dragged me out the door, without even allowing me to buy my groceries. And that's how I arrived home minus the groceries and wearing the remains of my ordeal. Maybe I'll just try ordering my groceries online from now on.